(electronic music) (bell ringing)
(upbeat music) – And that’s why I release
a new cold virus every year. Well some people think
that that cold virus just mutated, but they’re wrong, I spent all summer (mumbling).
(suspenseful music) – I can’t do it, I can’t do
another one of these detentions, I’m getting out of here. (boy grunting)
(hard thudding) Hard. – Wonderful escape attempt Bradley. – Ah, I thought that would work. – Why, it was a dumb plan. – Well I liked it, it’s
incredible what crazy ideas people concoct in their
most desperate times. – Or maybe Brad’s just an idiot. – Oh definitely, but even
the intelligent disciplined people of the U.S military
have concocted stupid plans. Schemes so ill conceived
that they had to be completely abandoned. (air whooshing)
Wanna see? – No, I don’t. (electronic beeping)
– Huh? What, was something supposed to happen? (electronic beeping)
– Uh, oh. (explosion roaring) (children gasping) – Welcome students to
Carlsbad, New Mexico. The year is 1943 and that man Lytle S. Adams
has a plan for a weapon that will end World War II. – I call it Project X-Ray. – Project X-Ray? War ending weapon, this sounds awesome. – It is, our plan is simple. First we catch a Mexican freetail bat, bear with me, then we surgically attach a small incendiary bomb
with a timed release, then, bear with me, we repeat this process exactly 1,040 times. Finally, bear with me
here, we put all those bats into a bomb case and drop
it over the target city, the bats will fly out,
roost all over the city and when the timer goes off, boom, fires everywhere. It’s so simple, it just might work. – Simple, that’s the craziest
idea I’ve ever heard. – I like it.
– Of course you do look at this guy, isn’t
he just the cutest, wittle method of madness to
watch it you’ve ever seen. – I am the knight.
– You sure are. – The Batman.
– Who is the knight? – Swear to me.
– You are. – I am the knight.
– You’re the knight. – This is insane, how do they
keep literally a thousand bats calm enough to shove them in a bomb? – Adams induced
hibernation by putting them in the refrigerator. (soft snoring)
– Swear to me. – Alfred.
– Where are they? – (mumbling)
– The bat. (soft muffled talking) – And they’re actually going through with this dumb ass plan? – Oh yes, they conducted several tests involving over 6,000 bats. Sometimes they were hibernating too deeply and just splattered into the ground. Sometimes they weren’t
hibernating deeply enough and blown up in farm houses miles away and one time the bats were
released accidentally. (bats groaning)
(triumphant music) They burned down an air hanger on base. (explosion roaring) And the General’s car. (flames roaring) In the end they spent over two years and two million dollars in testing, then, learning the bat bomb
needed another year of work, the military shut down the project. – So it was a dumb plan
that failed miserably? – That’s right and that’s
not even the dumbest, miserable failure of the war.
(electronic beeping) There’s an even stupider
plan being hatched right now on the other side of the country. Think fast.
(electronic beeping) – Ah, whoa, what, what?
(explosion roaring) – If you liked that episode of What the Fuck 101, I have good news, there’s
way more of it on Dropout. – Dropout is the new premium, ad-free, and uncensored comedy
platform from College Humor. – Go to dropout.tv and start your free trial today. – Swear you’ll do it.
– Swear! – Swear to me. – Isn’t he the cutest widdle
tool of cold war espionage? Yes he is, mm, yes, he is. (cat meowing)