[Sneezes] Oh my God. Music: “Stump Kitchen, Stump Kitchen, gluten free vegan eats and Stumptastic treats!” Welcome to Stump Kitchen [Siren noise] … there’s a siren. So I feel like it’s been a while since I’ve done a solo cooking episode. Let’s marinade some tofu together… Why not? So me and recipes have this like… interesting relationship Sometimes I love to follow them… sometimes I really don’t and for stuff like marinading tofu, there’s lots of amazing recipes out there but… i’m just gonna wing it Put stuff in a bowl and see if it tastes good. That’s how I make my marinade. Let’s do this. Garlic. For sure. Hold it down with your stump. Grrrrah! Woah, sh%t. Garlic on the floor [Sexy music playing] [Grunting] Oh! F%#k. Oooooh! [laughs] [grunts.] This is my daily workout. Smashing garlic with my stump. I need to tie my hair up because it’s getting in my way! There we go! [Grunting] Mmmm!!! Coarsely chop up your garlic. And then use your stump to scoop it into your body Cradle it into the bowl Garlic done. Now I like to put in something salty. Gluten free soy sauce. Tamari… Tamarye… Tamaree? Tamarye… Tamairi… This stuff. I don’t know, a whole bunch? Just like chicken wing technique that stuff into the bowl [indiscernible noises] I have some fresh ginger that I
have to use up and I love ginger I got a new microplaner and I get to use it yeah yeah yeah! Oh yeah, you know I don’t peel anything so… Oh my God. That much? I don’t know. Mix it mix it mix it up Do I look like a real chef now? [Applause sounds] I’m just gonna keep this cuz I like it! Something sweet. Maple syrup. [Rolling tongue noises] That much? I don’t know. [Loud burp] Pardon me A little bit of lime juice will like just… [indiscernible sound] eh? Fk this smells so good. Sriracha! Maybe… that much will be good? Wow. That is very good. There are some complex delicious flavours happening in there. Yeah, let’s put some liquid smoke in. Aaaaand we’re going back in. [rolling tongue sound] Yes. Smoky, teriyaki-ee, sweet and salty and citrus-ee a little bit Just tangy, beautiful flavour town. Let’s get the tofu out! I like firm tofu… oops. Oh yeah I forgot that there’s juice in here… [squish sound effect] [oops!] Oh my gosh, Probably going to end up using this as a
bacon replacer of some kind maybe in a BLT? I don’t know… so I’m going to cut it in like long thin strips but you can cut it however you want to. [rolling tongue sound] Kinda like this! Oh Sh#t! One thing I forgot earlier is a
little bit of salt and pepper Because salt and pepper should go in everything. All of your cooking. All of your baking. All of your breakfasts. All of your desserts! Here’s what I do Grab a Ziplock bag, stick your tofu in it, and kinda spread it out a little, like so. and then hold it open with your stump, and pour your marinade in! mmmmmmm, so goobery! Squish as much air out as you can… yeah… then it’s like a little vacuum-packed baggy-bags of good times Yeah! Stick this in the fridge for like… I’d say at least 4 hours put it in before you go to bed and have it the next day, like the longer your marinade it the better. I guess we’ll see you in… 4 hours or longer… yeah. So we’ll see you in a while, bye! Music: “Stump Kitchen, Stump Kitchen, gluten free vegan eats and Stumptastic treats!” Stumps are the best kitchen tools in the world, yeah!