Whoa, what if the dip
was inside the chip? Let’s talk about that.( music playing )Good mythical morning! Happy Groundhog Day! And speaking of hogs
on the ground, the big game is this Sunday! Now, we’re not allowed
to actually say the name of the game
for legal reasons,
but let’s just call it the ultimate American gridiron
tournament finale where the two football teams who ascended their respective
sides of the tournament bracket compete to establish
which football team is the best football team
for the current year 52! So today we’ll be attempting
some perfect field goal
trick shots and eating some unsavory
animal feet and balls. I get it. But first,
I don’t know about you, but I’m a little tired of
the typical food for that game that you talked about
way too long to describe. Yeah, you got guac.
You got peanut M&Ms.
You got wings. I’m so bored of the food,
that I’m actually watching
the game. Let’s change that. It’s time for… – Wow!
– Yeah. Way to go with the really
long title, Rhett. – Yeah.
– All right, so all of these
ingenuitive dishes that we are going to share
with you today can be made with the things
you’re already going to have laying around for
your ultimate American gridiron
blah blah blah… …party. Let’s get this party started. I’m sick of dipping my chips. It feels so 20th Century. We have 3D printers now,
people. And you go up to the dip, and there’s the remnants
of broken chips from other people who you know have touched the dip
with their fingers trying to get
that broken chip out – and then they gave up.
– Bad dippers. Bad dippers. Who knows what’s been on
their party people fingers? – I don’t wanna eat that.
– I got some guesses. So we thought,
what if we encased the dip
inside of the chip? And so we have created
“Great Balls of Queso,” aka “Balls Dip.” This is how you do it.You take your queso dip,and you form it into a ball
inside of some plastic wrap.Then you chill it
in the fridge.and while they’re setting,
you blend up some
tortilla chipsto make the chip crumbs.Once it’s set, you roll
the balls in flour.then egg batter,then tortilla chip crumbs,and deep fry themand then pops out these balls. Those balls. Grab one, Rhett. Inside, if we haven’t let them
got too cold– “Haven’t let them got too cold.” …there’s gonna be
some oozy goodness. All right, crack it. Crack it like an egg. – Look at that.
– Oh, my. – Oh, man.
– I’m gonna turn this up. And then I’m gonna–
I’m still gonna dip it
in some salsa. I kinda wanna just go raw
right here, with the first one. – Go raw?
– No salsa. It’s still warm in there. Mm-hm, and you know what? Look at that hand. There’s no dip on that hand. All of the dip is
inside of the globe. It’s so much more efficient. It’s got everything you need. and a nice little
handheld sphere. Oh, sorry, got a little cheese
on my mustache. And you’re kind of undermining
my thing about not being messy, but I guess that’s okay. Now, you can’t just wrap
some little smokies
in Pillsbury and call it an app anymore. That’s lazy! So we’re upping the ante
by taking the pig to the skies. If Pigs Could Fly In A Blanket. Okay, for this one,you take boneless
buffalo wings,wrap them in bacon,check, check.That’s the pig and the fly.You bake it at 375 degrees
for 15 minutes,till the bacon
is nice and crispy.Now you gotta have the blanket,so you wrap that whole mess
in puff pastryto keep it night and warm.Then you bake again,
this time at 385 degrees
for ten minutes.–And then you end up…
– Link:Out pops…Rhett:Oh, look at this.A flying pig,
cozy in a blanket. Look at that. Now, it’s a– it’s a big’un. – And you know, it’s–
– It’s a nice ‘un. – Look at that.
– It’s not too much blanket. You don’t wanna have
too much blanket. This is like a plain blanket.
You know what I’m saying? This is like the blanket
you get when you’re flying. – Yeah.
– Covers– Me, it covers, like,
17% of my body. It’s like a hand towel. I get, like, one thigh–
I get one thigh warmed
at a time. You don’t want
both thighs warm. – Uh-uh.
– You want a warm thigh
and a cold thigh. and then you wanna switch. What happens when two thighs
get too warm? Well, you melt.
( makes whooshing sound )
You just– That’s not what
I was thinking, but let’s– and this is
some ranch dip here. Ranch it, dink it, ’cause we dink the first one. Double dink this
for good measure. You’re trying to get
some more of my ranch
through a dink. Oh, man, this is gracious. “This is gracious”? I don’t believe
you meant to say that. Mm. Goodness gracious,
this is awesome. Yeah, goodness gracious.
You shortened it. This is so gracious, y’all. This is the kind of thing that is putting together
a bunch of things you love and seeing if something new
and wonderful will happen. I think something
new and wonderful is happening
in my mouth right now. I think I’m figuring out that I wanna be mummified in crescent roll. When I die, mummify me
in crescent roll. And then what, eat you? I don’t even care
at that point. I’m sure I’ll be happy
and gracious. Now, we love the Bloomin’ Onion
from Outback and the Awesome Blossom
from Chili’s. – The same thing.
– Yeah, copycat. But if they can make
an onion amazing, we thought, what would
the same approach do
to a pizza? – Uh-oh.
– Well, this is how
you go about it.You take a pizza.You slice the strips
to the center,but you leave a circle
in the middlewhere all the strips
can remain attached.You dredge the whole thing
in flour,then egg wash,
then bread crumbs.It’s a little difficult,but you shove it all
into a deep fryer,dip it down slowly,pull it back up,and you have
a bloomin’ pizza.– Rhett:Oh, my.
–Now, if you look
in the middle,and don’t, that’s
what has happened. You still got– I’ll get to the
middle soon enough. You get to that,
and if you’re still hungry, then you’re going to be
okay with that. It’s almost like
deep fried medusa. Yeah, we could call it that. Okay, so… And you– You know how it is trying to pull apart
a Bloomin’ Onion anyway. It’s a little unwieldy. We need to do
a little dippy dip. Yeah, Grandma’s reaching
for it. Your kid’s
tearing it apart. Hm. The crust is the least favorite
part of the pizza. It’s like we added more crust
to the pizza. Yeah, so I’m trying to figure
out, have we done a good thing? I don’t know. It’s like taking
the bottom of a pizza and making the bottom of
the pizza the top of the pizza. And still keeping the–
it as the bottom. – Right.
– It’s the everywhere
of the pizza now. It’s kind of like calzonish. Let me take a–
Let me find another spot. I think the other thing is,
like, it’s such a pleasant surprise when you bite into an onion
and it tastes that great. But with something
as great as pizza, like, is the pizza
the ceiling? – I think it might– Yeah.
– And then the breading. I think pizza
like an asymptote. Mm-hm. – Anything you do–
– You can bet your asymptote that it approaches
the asymptote, and then it can’t get
any better, and I feel like
by doing this to it, we moved it a little bit
off of the Y axis, if you know what I mean
by that. I know how Y you mean. I wanted to say Y
’cause I said Y axis. But we don’t wanna stop you
from trying it. – No, I mean–
– Approach your asymptote. With caution. There is such a thing
as an ice luge. Now, this is something
at parties, parties I haven’t been to, an ice sculpture where– – A ditch.
– There is basically this long luge, a slide, and you pour
a beverage of your choice and it cools down and goes into someone’s
waiting mouth. We are going to apply
that same advanced technology to chili with the chili slide. So we start
with a six-foot sub– which it turns out a six foot
sub is just subs put together.
Ha ha. We’re going to discard
the toppings but keep these intact so the crew can enjoy just sub for days. What I wanna do is actually
create a bottomless sub but has the bottom as a top
and the top as a top. …all these together but just
setting them down just like they were on the sub, basically creating another sub. Got it down. Just start scooping out
the lettuce liberally. And I think a little bit
of lettuce just to flavor the chili as it comes down the slide Yeah, that never hurt anybody
whose done this before. Now I’m going to take
this rolling pin, really wanna create a nice… luge-like center to this thing. You know,
I want to have a channel. They call this
the chili channel. Yeah, you just wanna
ditch it up. Lots of ditchin’. – Which is also a fail–
– Ditchin’ and groanin’. – The chili channel is a failed
Food Network initiative.
– Groan, man. I was into it. Now, I’m going to take
my end here. – Let’s support–
– You going to the back,
or am I going to the back? – I’m going to the back.
– Oh, yeah, go to the back. We’re going to put it
on the luge right there. Now I’m going to elevate ’cause we have to have
an angle that is conducive to chili
sliding, Link. – Please just…
– ♪ Bum, bum, bum… ♪ Link, keep an eye on that. ( hums fanfare from
“2001: A Space Odyssey” ) That’s nice. Now, that is a steep chili luge,
my friend. That’s going to come down
at a rate into my mouth that I might not be
comfortable with. Get comfortable, brother,
’cause it’s coming. All right. I got a pot full of chili. You better have
a belly full of waitin’. Okay. Three, two, one, chili slide! Oh, goodness,
that is pleasant. It’s like a turd avalanche. It’s coming, Link.
It’s coming. It’s coming. It’s coming, Link.
Open the hatch! It’s still coming, Link.
It’s like a mudslide! Yeah! How much
did you get down? ( gags ) Boy, the kinetic energy
really gives it a good flavor. – Yeah.
– Oh, man, you gotta try this. ( chuckling )
Oh. Okay, here we go. – You ready?
– Yeah! – Bring it!
– Three, two, one! Chili slide! Oh, it looks so great coming–
look at that. It’s like a volcanic eruption. Wait for it. Link:
Oh, gosh! That is heinous. I’m getting as much as I can. It looks like that one time I
looked over at Rhett in third
grade at a make-out party. Oh, my goodness. I got a fair amount. Did I get some in my eye? He’s blind! But it was worth it. It was–
It was worth every second, worth every drop. The last thing he saw was an avalanche of chili coming right towards his mouth
and his eyes. I’m just going to stay
right here ’cause I’m afraid
to open my eyes. But I had a great time. Enjoy the big game. Click on through to see us nail some insane
field goal trick shots. Rhett:You got “Ear Biscuits”
for your ear hole.Now get
an “Ear Biscuits” Mason jarfor your mouth hole
at mythical.store.And don’t be
a you-know-what hole.