– All right, Year Nines, it’s time to learn Maths. Now, Mark ‘class clown’ Bananna, I heard about you, and your tomfoolery. Telling you now, not being tolerated by me. – Fair enough, sir. Will this be tolerated though? (Farting noises) (students laughing) – No, it will not.
– Come on! (students laughing)
Come on! Cut it out! This is Maths, not Batman comic books. – Oh, Maths, well I’ve got some Maths for you, sir. (farting noises) plus,
(farting noises) equals
(farting noises) (students laughing)
(farting noises) – No, that’s not true, that’s not what Maths equals. You’re making Maths into a fart joke. – Mr. Broden, can I
please go to the bathroom. – To wank! (loud gasping) – I would never wank at school. (Mark moans loudly)
(classmates laughing) – That’s not what she meant at all, and you cut it. I’m gonna bend over get a bathroom pass. So she can go. (loud farting) – Oh, someone has too many beans! (students laughing)
Mr. Beany boy! (loud laughing)
– That wasn’t me. – Mr. Beany boy. – I swear to God that was not me. (bell pings loudly)
– Mark the class clown, please some to the office. You’ve had a family emergency. – Oh, I’m in trouble. I reckon mum’s found my pornos!
(students laughing) No more wanky for Marky!
(students laughing) – That’s such bloody carry on. – Under the fan.
(students applaud) – Thanks for making this
the best class ever guys. – Oh, I’m glad that he’s gone. He was a real Margaret Thatcher to me coal mine unions.
(bell pings) – Replacing Mark as the class clown will be Victorian era gentleman and humorous Lord Wellington Montcrief. – I would say good day to you, but upon seeing your face I have half a mind to turn heel and head back to bed, in hopes this is but a fever dream. (students laughing) – Yeah, very witty Lord Wellington. Now, listen I’ve heard about you and your tomfoolery is not gonna be tolerated. – You’ll see no Tom foolery from me, as for Wellington foolery dear sir, well, that is an entirely
different matter. (students laugh loudly) – Stop fucking around, you little cunt! It’s time for Maths! – Here is some arithmetic. I’m an Englishman in addition to 3:00 p.m. equals tea time. I’ll have an Earl Gray if you please, and a few short bread
biscuits wouldn’t go astray. – At once dear sir, but wait a minute! (loud clanking) You tricked me! (students laughing) – Mr. Broden, can I
please go to the bathroom? – Mr.Broden, this student
needs to relieve herself, but once she leaves the room I suspect that it is we
who will be relieved. (students gasping) – That was actually a good one. I’m gonna pick up the bathroom pass. – Well, it seems some of
those short bread biscuits did go astray. (students gasping) – Hey, stop fat shaming me. (bell pings)
– Lord Wellington Montcrief, please come to the office. You’ve had a family emergency. – Well, I hope this time I’m left something in the will. (students laughing) (students applaud) (students cheering) (bell pings) – Replacing Lord Wellington
as the class clown is Tony Martin doing some of his classic 90s standup. – It’s edible underpants, I never know where you get them. Is that lingerie, or the food court? I’m never sure.
(students laughing) Never sure. – Ohh, now we’re cooking
with gas. (laughs) – They come in eight different flavors. Do the people who are
using edible underpants need eight different flavors? Is someone going, you know darling, I really prefer you in tangy barbeque. I don’t know.
(students laughing) – It’s ridiculous.
– Now this I like. This is comedy.
(students laughing) – Wearing some now are you? I’m sure you are.