You know what’s happening
in the world, right? Recently, what’s happening in the world. The attitude shift in everyone. You’ve noticed? Well, everybody wants to change the world. Every single person right now is like, “I will change the world.” How? By telling other people
how to do their job. It’s amazing.
It’s my favourite thing, online. Someone crashes into a car,
someone takes a photo. “Mumbai police, do your job.” I changed the world. Yeah, because Mumbai Police
has a social media team, no. “Oh, Prakash! Come on, let’s go.” Like they don’t have shit to do. So recently, I took a flight on Jet Airways. So you know, how recent this is. Yes! Let’s clap for bankruptcy. So I reached the airport and
everyone’s like fighting. I was like what’s going on? What happened was Jet Airways had combined two flights into one and thought no one would notice. And 300 people are pissed off. They’re like, how can my ticket
get cancelled? How can my ticket get cancelled? They’re like, “Sir, it’s your fault only.” So I was like enraged. I was like, I’m gonna change the world. And I tweeted, right. I tweeted. I said, “Jet airways, how dare you
cancel my ticket!” “How dare you do this to me!” “You know how important I am?” “How dare you do this?” Next week the airline only
got cancelled, dude. And I felt so guilty. Like… is this my fault? This is the first time
I ever complained about something the whole airline got cancelled. So I freaked out.
I started doing research. I’m like what happened to Jet airways?
Is it me? Did I do something? Kenny Sebastian tweeted and boom!
Stocks fell. I was like “Ooh!” But it turns out,
it was mismanagement, okay. Classic! Classic! Someone internally was just
siphoning out funds for shit. The company got bankrupt. And then I did more research and Indigo
is doing incredibly well, okay. Indigo is so happy. I was like, why did Indigo succeed
and Jet airways fail? And I figured it out. Jet airways made the mistake
of giving us comfort. Yeah. You go to a Jet airways flight
and they’re like, “You want a blanket?” Yeah. You’ll really give me blanket? Keep it for the full flight… Keep it and enjoy! Warm, I’m warm. “You want food?” Food? “Veg or non-veg?” Choice is there? Choice! Veg. And while you leave the flight they’re like “Kenny!”
– Yeah? “Bye!” Thank you, Jet airways. And then the company
became bankrupt. Indigo! I’m not making this up, Indigo. I sat on a flight and I asked the air hostess
can I have a blanket and she said “We don’t have blankets only.” Which is a great way to end an argument. We’ve been waiting for 20 minutes
can you give me water? “There’s no water in the whole continent,
what you’ll do, dude?” It’s crazy! So I was like, but I’m feeling cold. I want blanket. So he’s like, “Sir “we don’t have a blanket
on the whole flight.” I said, “Then what do I do
if I’m feeling cold?” “Sir, we’ll switch off the AC then.” I was like “Wow!” Do you know my dad? Cause this is exactly what he does. Yeah. Indigo is my childhood, basically. I’m like, “No don’t switch off the AC.” “Okay, you know what,
I just want to eat something.” “Want to eat something?
500 bucks!” That’s so expensive. Yeah, eating out is expensive. Don’t eat from outside,
get your own ‘dabba’ and come. And you don’t mess with air hostesses
in general. It’s my request. ‘Cause it’s a very hard job. The airline industry is full of very hard jobs
that look simple to us, right? To become an air hostess or a male whatever. Air host? No one cares about them. You see like a male guy you’re like “Hey, what are you doing here, dude?
Go home.” Nobody cares. They have been trained
in emergency situations where if the plane crashes
and if there’s a fire, they have to keep people calm. That’s the level of sophistication
and training they have to go through. But all we hear is,
“Sir, we don’t have ‘Maggi’.” “Sir, we don’t have Maggi.
What can I do?” “Sir, please sit down when
the seatbelt sign is on.” That’s all they do. I feel so bad. They say it a billion times. Don’t get up when the seatbelt sign is on. Correctly, when the plane lands
one guy is like, “La la la la.” La la! Everyone just is jumping up. If you give her a sniper
I feel you know she’ll take out everyone. The airport system in India is designed to make sure you don’t get on your flight. To make sure. That’s their sole purpose.
They want you to go back home. You enter an airport they’ll be like,
“Hello, where are you going?” Sir, I… I have a flight. You have a flight? Show ticket. Why? Why would I come here if I didn’t have ticket? Sir, my ticket. Who’s Kenneth Sebastian? It’s me, sir. It’s me. I won’t fly on behalf
of my grandfather, no? It’s me. Show ID. Now he’s looking at the ID. So now you have to look like yourself. Some comment he has to pass, no? Haircut? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. In the four years since I
took this photo I took haircut, sir. And then you enter and this is the worst part… where you have to scan your bag through the X-ray machine. And the people working here are the slowest creatures I’ve seen. And I don’t blame them.
It’s a very boring ass job. Because nobody has done a thousand push-ups, gone through mud trenches, climbed ropes to just tap people on their armpits, gently. Nobody wants to do that,
so they’re pissed. If you want to see how slow
time can go, get your bag separated from other bags, that’s it. Sir, that’s my bag, sir.
That’s my bag. Sir, that’s my bag. “Open!” Why, sir? “Open your bag.” Why, sir? “There’s juice. “There’s juice in your bag.” Sir, there’s no juice in my bag. “There’s juice in your bag. “There’s juice in your bag.” Sir, I don’t know which song this is, sir. Good luck for your career. But there’s no juice in my bag, sir. “No, your “juice is in the bag,
otherwise it won’t get stopped.” Sir, I remember how I packed my bag, sir. Underwear, T-shirt, juice…
I didn’t do that. I didn’t… Nobody does that, sir. “Open your bag,
there’s juice in your bag.” And I open the bag
and there was juice in my bag. I don’t know how it happened. There was juice in my bag,
I don’t know. The worst part is you know, on the flight when at the end of the flight you leave and the pilot comes out and says, “Thank you for flying.” “Have a good day!” You know, I spoke to some pilots and
they say they don’t have to do that. They do it because they love flying and they want to see the passengers. They want to thank them. And apparently, passengers give them feedback on the flying. The arrogance to give feedback to a pilot. This is how you give feedback to a pilot. Usually, you’ll be like, “Hey pilot, I know you’re a pilot. “I know what you’re doing. I’m sure. “Obviously, you’ve been trained and all. “It’s your job actually. “I just want to give feedback. “Very simple feedback. Don’t feel bad. “I’m a passenger, yeah. “I just felt it was a little rough, so “don’t take it…
You know, I’m sure your goal “is to give a smooth landing, no?
Of course. “So anyway, bye.
Have a good life!” That’s how you’re supposed
to give feedback, if you want to give. This is how pilots get feedback about landing. “Next time!” Pilot is like “Mumbai police, please arrest this fellow.”